Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Remind me, when I am old.

I wonder...

One day - when the kids are grown -  will I miss the 4 bikes, 2 skateboards, Scooter, Ripstick, Tricycle, and Princess Scooter that take up a ton of space but my kids love oh so dearly?

Monday, November 29, 2010

Day 22 - /Cry

Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.

I reallllllllllllllllly wish I hadn't donated all my size 12 & 14's to the kidney foundation in leiu of the new fancy size 8&10 jeans I was finally wearing....because helloooooo...I was NEVER gaining that weight back.

I waited two years to toss that stuff - and then ended up pregnant two months later. And, I'm not certain I will EVER see a size 8 again!

Sniff. Sniff.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Miss Coley - Day 21ish

Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

What an dumb question - Go to the hospital, duh.  I love my best friend like a sister.

Sometimes, Love Hurts

Especially when a 5mo old baby is learning to grasp...

Mr. Ambitious

5 months!


It was a big month for John, aka Mr. Ambitious.

(That's a nick name from mama - I started calling him that when he was only 3 days old. He was trying with all his might to better control his head, and to strengthen his back. It has fit so perfectly)

He is such a strong, physical baby. I call him a Beast! During his fourth month: he accomplished rolling over both front to back, and back to front. He can push himself up on his arms and now also his knees. (yes...ALL FOURS. I will have a crawler next month, I bet!). He scooches, and army crawls. He is still trying mastering sitting up, but that will come with time.

He is determined and curious. He is doing very well at bringing his hands together to grasp toys. If he can hold it, it will go into his mouth. He loves to be sitting up - or looking out, to observe step by step everything going on around him. And trust me, some days - there is A LOT going on.

He is also very laid back, very content and easy going. He nonchalantly captures the attention of everyone in the house. He smiles a TON! And giggles some. He's not as vocal as my girls were - but I think that comes with being a fellow...no joke!

We started some baby foods because he was starting to drink 11ounce bottles every 3 hours - a sure sign, from my mommy book, that he was ready to try something with more substance. Advice differs between professionals - but most say to begin solids between 4 and 6 months. So, we went for it.  He took to the spoon like a flippin champ - and is loving bananas, applesauce and pears. I introduced them one week at a time (bananas allll week, applesauce the next...etc) and none seemed to hurt his belly. I will stay away from corn, green beans, and squash as there is a family history of a food allergy - and I'm not tempting the foodie fate.

We hold him, love him, kiss him, hug him, tickle him, and simply adore him. He's brought such a central source of joy and brightness to our family. I cannot express how lucky I feel to have a baby to love on again - it's one of the most natural, satisfying feelings. 

We love you handsome chunk of a baby boy!

Day 20ish - Don't Do Drugs. I'm not kidding.

Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Don't do drugs. Drugs are bad

That is all.

I am being a bit facetious, with my Southpark reference - but joking aside, it's the damn truth. Drugs ARE bad, and NO, you shouldn't do them! BUT, I thought I would elaborate. It's kinda personal - I don't really have conversations about it - but whatevs! That is what this about.

Marijuana: Pot, as it's referred to in my vernacular. I do not, whatsoever, believe Pot should be classified in the same category as cocaine, meth and Heroin. I believe that too many jail cells are full of otherwise good people - and that something that is 'legal' for medicinal purposes in some states, should be accepted in ALL states. One of the biggest  wastes of you hard earned tax dollars - are the feds shutting down dispensaries in states where it is recognized as a medication. Makes NO sense to me, at all.

Prescription Meds: Everyone should have a Valium.  HA! Just making a joke, yo. I know first hand - there are some people who require prescription to feel better - to focus, to calm, to treat. There is no shame in any type of Mental Illness - go get it treated! I do believe that ADD/ADHD is real - Some kids genuinely need it - and some adults do too. But.... often over diagnosed, or missed diagnosed.

While there is a real need for using prescription medication - there is also a real epidemic of them being used as a recreational drug. These pills are highly addictive - and highly deadly. It's happening in our own backyard, homies.  One of the ugliest prescription drugs is Oxycotton, Oxycodone. It gives a very heroin-esq response. It kills people, often. I have mentioned following the story of Henry Grangu - son of a well respected writer in the blogsphere - beautiful, peaceful, loving 18yr old boy overdosing due to a wicked addiction to these. You can watch Henry's Story Here.

Heroin/Cocaine/Crystal Meth/Crack: All these drugs fall into the same category in my mind. All of them - much like prescription pills - are incredibly addictive. They ruin lives. As a young mother and wife - I watched a good friend of the family succumb to a full blown heroin addiction. The best way to describe it is like watching a huge, visible, dark cloud slowly, and completely envelope a person until it reigns supreme. There is no life or passion in their eyes and you can see it steal their soul. Know that sounds dramatic, but it's the truth. He was one of the rare ones, who beat it. He is not the norm.

As we say in our house......Just don't do that. 

Saturday, November 27, 2010

GS > Skill, ffs.

This is only funny to my WoW / Gamer lovelies.

It's OH. SO. TRUE.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Rotten? Rae Rae? Never.

This would be my beautifully scheming, otherwise delightful 3 year old.

Baby John @ 5 months!

Baby John will be 5 months old this Thursday - Thanksgiving Day!

Jolly John - Seriously, these smiles are intoxicating!

This is his pondering look.

Naturally Content..........

Monday, November 22, 2010

Nicer, Family Friendly, Good Music

A FB friend posted this a few weeks back, and I heard it then and I loved it.

Abby and I discovered it this weekend, and She, Raegan and I have been jamming it at least twice a day.

Love it. Such a good song for girls, and women alike.

The hardest one, by far. Day 19ish : Your thoughts on God

 What do you think of religion? 

This God question has left me staring at a brick wall for weeks.  I had no idea this post would prove to be the hardest for me to write. I think that's why I've been slacking a bit too - trying to get through this question.

At first I thought it was because I respect my friends of different faiths, and those of no faith at all. I didn't want to offend, or  I didn't want to sound judgy. But, those concerns were squelched in the confidence of knowing that most people who know me, know that I am genuinely open and accepting, no matter what. And, this was my turn to offer my views, and I knew they would be classy enough to respect mine.

So if it wasn't that, what was it?

I've been very outright in admission of being a Christian, and believing in God and Jesus and all that jazz. I've mentioned I believe in the Power of Prayer, Jesus love, and God's Power in some prior posts. We all know that I am far from a perfect Christian, and am just a normal Jesus loving girl.

But there is something you would be surprised to know.

I  don't attend a church, and have not since the age of fourteen.


Shocking! How can that be, right?

I find myself having to defend my choice to Believers and Atheist friends alike.

Believers: Doesn't Jesus Girl = Church girl?

Non Believers: Doesn't Church girl = Jesus Girl?

My reasons for not attending church are very deeply, deeply personal. I don't harbor any ill feelings regarding Religious establishments, Houses of Worship or those who attend them. In fact, a few years back I was really struggling with this, and asked God to introduce me to some really good, genuine, church going, Jesus Girls - and he did! These four women were excellent examples of fun, down to earth, genuine Church going Women. They don't know it - but they greatly changed how I view ladies of the church. That being said - I still struggle with the thought of attending.

And you know what?

God knows that.

God knows all about my situation, my issue, my hurt. He knows it better than anyone else - and it hurts him too. He is patient with me because he loves me with such a relentless love - and he knows everything hidden about me.  He has offered me a very intimate relationship with Him, outside the doors of a church. Without. A. Doubt.

So, I'm just gonna write on what I personally know about God.

He created the Heavens and the Earth - and he created you and me - and everything in between.

He sent his son, Jesus - to die for my sins. He says - Whoever believes in Him (Jesus) Will have eternal life. The Bible goes on to say that once you have accepted Jesus as lord - you will forever be in the palm of the God Almighty's hand. He promises me that he will always provide what is best for me  - and even though it may hurt, he will see us through it - and he does have a purpose with our lives.

I believe the Bible is real - and is God's message to us and a source of all kinds of comfort and direction.

I believe God is very, very real. I need no scientific proof - I need no vivid picture. I have had many instances in my life where God has shown his undeniable power - Most Miraculously HERE, the story of nearly losing my first born son. It's a moving story, and all the proof I need. But, he has shown himself in so many other was as well.

Let me share an old story about a specific time where I undoubtedly witnessed God's unshakable hand holding mine....

I was 19 and I was working at the Courtyard Airport - we just had Jakob, and we were living together in our first apartment. (It was a nice apartment, and very pricey for our modest budget). We were struggling! I knew that our baby formula would be running out soon - and it was a day before payday and I had zero dollars to my name.  I had posted a rather large sum of money at the beginning of the shift - larger than normal and all in cash. I was downright tempted to steal $10 - tempted like I hadn't ever been tempted before. And never tempted like that since! It was eerie. It's eerie, even now. I totally felt the devil on my shoulder. I had never stole anything in my entire life! That's wrong. That's distrustful. That's BAD! BUT, I needed to feed my baby - the temptation was real.

So, heavily burdened, I went to my car and prayed during my lunch. I mean I prayyyyed. I specifically said to God: Look, It's been a minute, we used to know each other, but I'm being really tempted to do something wrong to feed my baby. My gut is saying No, don't do it, and Just trust God..and that's what I'm going to do. So, if you are real: Show yourself to me, have some formula for me when I come home.  So, I went in - and intentionally made an early drop of all the cash I had taken in, early in the shift, and I trusted God the entire day and on the way home.

When I got home - I stopped to check the mail, per normal - and in there was an official envelope with my name on it. I opened it up, and it was my tax return. That return wasn't due for another 5 weeks - I had submitted it via mail the week before, and was being mailed a check a WEEK LATER. But there. it. was.

God had answered my prayer - and showed his existence to me. All I asked him to provide was one can of $10 formula, and instead I had a check for $2500 waiting for me. That was not coincidence - that was God.

The great thing about God - is that he will show you himself if you ask. He certainly does not perform on demand - but if you have an earnest heart, and say, God: Show me your love today - He will do it.

Everything Good, comes from God.

In a nutshell:
So yeah, I believe God is real based on faith, the words of the bible and the experiences of my life. I do not believe that a church defines a Christian, nor will not attending one exclude you from God's love and the kingdom of heaven. Church is good for most, but not a prerequisite - in my opinion and experience. If you love God, ask Forgiveness for your sins, accept his Jesus as the Messiah, Read his word and Search for his ways....You are as much of a Christian as one that attends church morning, noon and night.

This is one my my favorite verses of the bible - and one that I try to live by, every day. 

36 “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”
 37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

Matthew 22: 36-40 

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Representin' the OBZ!

My Baby Brother John - by Abby

Abby had to write her first "story". It was a personal narrative and she earned an A. I loved it, and it made me tear up a little. She loves that little boy so, so, so much. 

My baby brother is very sweet. If you smile at him he will smile back at you. My mom smiles at him too and he smiles at her a lot. 

My mom and I play with John. I play with a monkey toy. My mom tickles him. Sometimes I like to read to him, and sometimes he does not like it. Sometimes I can put him in his bouncy chair. If you turn it on, it will vibrate. Raegan loves him too and tries to hold him. She also helps feed him. Maybe, some days, my mom let's me push him in his stroller. I love to feed him and once he puked on me. he is going to eat rice food now. My mom and I like to put him on the floor and play with him there.

I feel happy because he is so sweet and loving. It is fun because I get to do all the stuff my mom does except I have to ask first. I love my baby brother, very much.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Upon further inspection -

I was sooo wrong about the wicked cute cloth diaper being reasonable - it was $13.95.  I read $2.95!

That was the shipping, Duh.

Anyways - $15 for ONE.

I wonder how many you actually need to start out with. I would need at least 10 to feel comfortable making it through ONE day.

Interesting to consider though. But, I'm still on the bad hippie side of the fence filling up landfills with my disposable diapers. Terrible, I know.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

An Investment, perhaps?

If I were to cloth diaper, Baby John would rock something like this

I'm also surprised at how reasonable they are!

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Just Call Me....Cloth Diaper MacGyver!

What did you do last night?

Wanna know what I did?

You do? Great. Cause, I'm dyyying to tell you...

I nearly duct taped a make shift cloth diaper on my baby.

ahahaha. Did you just bust out laughing? 'Cause I just did.

I so wish I was joking! Don't worry, I DIDN'T!!

Baby John and I shared a hearty laugh as soon as I said it. I would NEVER actually duct tape anything to a baby, for eff's sake. BUT, I was caught in a dilema!! A DIAPER CRISIS!

I noticed that we were low on diapers when Wilo left for work - and I told him to bring some home. He's home late on Friday's but I was certain we had enough to last. Aaand, We did - until about 10pm, when disaster struck.

I never, ever, ever run out of diapers. EVER, in FOUR kids. (Yes, I know - Earthy me, using disposables, but whateves, it's my style. I love cloth diapers, but just can't commit to that much extra laundry, and I can't afford a diaper service. True stories.) Anyways, I can alwayyyyys find an "emergency" diaper, if need be.

Not last night!

I couldn't find a single one. Not one in the diaper bag. Not one on a baby doll. Not one hiding in a toy box, not one hiding in a junk drawer. Not one - anywhere!  And it's like 10:30 by this point. Baby John, who's been enjoying hanging out au natual this whole time, is smiling and laughing at me. I mean big, fat, slobbery, juicy smiles and full out belly laughter as I'm talking him through this fiasco. What to do?! I can't really go get them  because, at the most obvious - Baby John is nekkid! Because I was certain, CERTAIN there was one around here!

Light bulb goes off! I'm a bright woman! I'll just make a cloth one! I can do it! I was a girl scout till 8th grade, yo! 

I think to myself...I'll just go grab a cloth diaper - I've always had them with my babies, bought soley for other purposes, they are wicked handy.


I also realized during this time that I have been committing a crime by not having an actual cloth diaper either. That is so sad, SO SO SO SAD.  I apparently forgot their importance this time around, like a total mommy nooblet. Out of necessity, I then decide that a that a receiving blanket could work...

I quickly figured out the shape of how it should fit, and I'm feeling really positive and proud of myself for figuring this out. Then, I'm like ok, just gotta fasten this up...

With what?

Saftey pins? I don't ever have those around allll the time, I have those sometimes! And right now, we don't have any!

Duct Tape?

YUP! That's where my brain went next. It fixes everything right?!

 I know!  How funny is that?

As soon as I said it to John, I laughed sooo hard, and so did he.

I quickly abandoned that idea, of course. I opted to use some really small, clear, hair rubberbands to secure it together instead. It would do.

It was such a novice move - not knowing 100% for sure that I had enough diapers, not having cloth diapers around - but it was such a silly, lovely encounter with my baby J. He's such a happy, pleasant boy.  He snuggled down promptly with a bottle, his blanket, and me by his side. We cuddled for the rest of the night....

...in his make shift, MacGyver-ed cloth diaper.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Stuck inside my head

My word, it's been a minute!

I don't know how to explain it really - all week long I've thought about writing but I just couldn't sit down and compose my thoughts.

Probably because my thoughts have been kinda jumbled these past few days to be completely confessional. Stuck inside my head, is really the correct Meli-ism to use there - it's what it definitely feels like. A few normal things have been stressing me out lately - and imagine those things, with every possible scenario, both realistic and far fetched, stuck on an endless repeat inside your brain for days at a time.



Oh, so Lame-o.

I hate it when I get like that - and It's happened my whole life! 97% of the time, I have everything in check, am very laidback and faithful, and then WHAM! Sit yo' ass down and dwell on the uncertain - over and over again. 

I break free of those persistent thoughts to function, obviously - my kiddies are a brilliant distraction, both in the emotional and the practical sense - there's not much time to 'stew' when there is homework to be done, clothes to be washed, hugs to be given and babies to love.

But they're still there at the end of the night, when all are sleeping - and it's just me here. Time normally spent writing, or connecting, - is instead spent watching mindless TV, or reading blog after blog, article after article after article - as an introverted attempt to cope.

And then.

I'm reminded of the same thing, every time.

I don't have to worry about them. I have the Utmost High on my side, ensuring that all will turn out as part of His plan. He doesn't promise that everything will be pretty, but He does promise that he'll be here every step of the way.

And the Meli sunshine starts to come back..

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Coffee Date

I've had a few days lapse in writing - due to me cleaning like a mad woman for a couple days, then collapsing in exhaustion at night. Seriously, people, I've been going to bed at like 10 - which is so not my typical deal. I've been also rearranging bedrooms, cleaning out closets and shampooing carpets... which is also not my typical deal.


Here are some adorablly cute photos of Baby John. He is dyyyyyiiiingggg to sit up on his own. He wants it sooo badly. That's still a few weeks away on the milestones, but until then he's enjoying sitting up in the corner of the couches as we have our coffee together in the morning.

Rae Rae is also part of our coffee date - though she prefers to spend the first twenty minutes or so under a blanket, intermittently yelling LEAVE ME ALONE - until she wakes up enough and out pops this enthusiastic, energetic, chipper, caring, loving conversationalist. I have noooooo idea where she would get her morning grumpiness from.

Wanna join us next time? I have good coffee...and plenty of blankets.... 

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Day 18 - My Views on Gay Marriage

Your views on gay marriage.

I've been thinking about how to address this - over and over and over again - since I read the 30 day questions.

There is much that I could say, but I think I'm gonna just keep this short and sweet...to the best of my short and sweet ability (which is pretty damn horrible, and you know that's damn true if you know me! I typically have a lot to say).

Here goes:

Who am I to tell someone who they can, and cannot love forever?

I, personally, know two gay men who have been in love and committed to each other for as long as my parents have been married. They are a better example of how a marriage should be (commitment, communication, compromise, trust,) than many of the hetero-sexual marriages I know.

I've also known two gay women who have been together for over 15 years, who literally saved the lives of two children trapped in a very, very bad environment with their natural, married, hetero-sexual birth parents.

I would NEVER, in a million years, tell either of these couples that their lives, their loves, and their commitment to each other was not as valid as mine. I would never tell them that they could not stand in front of their family, friends and God - and make a public commitment to one another.

I am certainly not qualified to make that judgment, and neither are you.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Day 17 - Ban those Books?

A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.

Ok, so believe it or not - I'm, um...a conservative. No! I am NOT kidding! It's shocking, I know. It goes against most people's perceptions of me - and even more so if you know Wilo, because he's um....RIDICULOUSLY AND LOUDLY LIBERAL. 

Whew. Sorry. I just really felt the need to emphasise that. I'll resume my inside voice.

Anyways - my point of telling you that - is for years, I bought the hype the conservative parties threw out regarding...books that should be banned.

GASP! But, Melissa you say - HOW COULD YOU?! I mean, you say you love reading, and literature and the arts...but you would actually avoid a so called banned book!?

Yes, Yes I would...for the longest time. I guess I just bought the propaganda that those books were just bad.  

Now, this shocked and disgusted my liberal hubby who is an avid reader, by nature, Who despises censorship... also by nature. He was all like..."Whhhaaaatttt? YOU? YOU of ALL people buy into this garbage?" And I'm all, "Well HELLOOOO, there IS controversy for a reason!" He's like..."WHAT reason?! Have you READ it? Read the book, form your OWN opinion!"...  I'll save you the exact debate, but you get the point.


This series called Harry Potter came out.

And it was highly debated.

And there were many people working towards banning it from schools.

I was all like..."THAT book, is NOT coming in my house."

Wilo was all..."Like Hell it ISN'T."

So he bought it, brought it home and spent the next 2 or 3 days reading it. I am sure I was probably snotty about it - it's a little in my nature, sometimes! - but when he was finished, he came to me and said: You MUST read this book. You must, must, must, must, MUST read this book. He told me it was by far, one of the best stories he's ever read. And, he's always been rather well read.

I have to admit, the thought of reading a banned book seemed sooooo bad girl-ish, to me.  Picture that hot librarian, in those hot glasses, naughtily sneaking way behind a bookshelf tooo.....read a banned book... /sexy evil laugh.  It was like breaking the rules - touching something off limits, something wrong and forbidden - I couldn't stop myself.

So, I read it.

and LOVED it.

L-O-V-E-D it, and have read the entire series, since.

I could not fathom why anyone would want to ban such a book. It was imagination, and creativity, and excitement. It was incredibly well written, and non offensive. Why, oh why, would anyone want to stop people from reading something sooooo goooood???

And um....perhaps all those the other debated books that "should be banned", SHOULD NOT BE BANNED, either.

Perhaps we should all read them for ourselves, and base our own opinions....and perhaps no one should have the right to BAN someone elses writing.

Thanks, Harry. 

Thanks, Wilo.