Sunday, October 31, 2010

Man on the Mountain

I fell in loooovvvveeeeeee with this man on the mountain the first time I heard this song, a long, long time ago. This song was randomly in my head as I go to bed tonight - and just thinking of it gives me butterflies, still.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Day 16: TV or not to TV

Someone or something you definitely could live without.

I could definitely live without Television.

I'm being serious!

Don't get me wrong - I DO love me some Nick Jr, um... how else would I finish things done in a pinch? But for the most part, I could live without it...and I have.

Oh, we owned a TV, but we didn't have cable for oh, forever. It wasn't until this summer that we changed providers and received a pretty sweet deal for what we are getting.

I never really missed it.

Much of TV is just...stupid. And, the things that I did like to watch I could always watch the next day on this brilliant little website.

Even with a bazillion channels - I find that I still only watch a few shows.

Here is what I am watching currently: Ghost Hunters, Ghost Adventures, GLEE!, Amazing Race, Star Trek, Chuck, oh and Keeping up with the Kardashians...because who doesn't love some "reality" TV.  When the Bachelor comes back on...I'll be watching that too.

These are pretty much the BEST shows on television in my humble, non tv-watching, opinion.

p.s. Playing on the internet is totally different than watching TV. TOTALLY.

Friday, October 29, 2010

Happy Halloween

Trick or Treat!!! 
Have a safe and Happy Halloween Weekend, you guys!

Jake was a convict, Hobo. He was a very humorous one, too.

Abby was Alice from Alice in Wonderland.

Raegan was a Diva, Butterfly Fairy Princess Barbie. I through in the Diva, she chose the rest.
Our favorite cousin and great friend Griffin - He was a Mexican riding an Ostrich. hahaha. I laughed outloud typing it, but it's true AND funny. (And comes with a fan that inflates the ostrich!)
Baby John went as a wickedly adorable, jolly, chunk of a 4month old baby.

Day 15 - No Sister Wives for Wilo

Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.


I could never be Mormon.

30 days - Day 14... N/A

A hero that has let you down. (letter) it weird that I've only ever had two heroes - Jesus and My Dad -  and they've never, ever let me down?

N/A , is my answer to this one.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

30 Days: Day 13, HOOOOKAHHHH.

A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)

Dear Ekoostik Hookah:

Ok, I know it's been a long minute since we last saw each other, and I know that you don't have any recollection of who I am, but..I'm doing this blog deal where I have to write daily for 30 days, and today's topic is to write a letter to a band who's gotten you through some tough ass days. (Their words, not mine).

Well, dahlings, I chose you.

And trust me, it was no easy task in deciding who to chose either - feel special! You beat out The Dead, Sublime, Mike Perkins, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, Johnny Cash.. amongst others. I love music - and have several 'special' bands who have paved my rough days with sunshine.

I chose you for a few specific reasons....

You represent a time in my life where I was completely free. I was barely an adult, with no real job and no real responsibility. All I was concerned about was being kind, peaceful and getting to the next show to dance my tooshie off with good friends and a couple hundred other free spirits.  You see, now.... I'm married with FOUR kids. Yes, you read that correctly FOUR kids. I am also well into adulthood and have responsibility pouring out my ears, and spilling all over my already messy floor, which is also my responsibility to clean up.

I "met" my husband at your Halloween show on October 31, 1999. Well, I guess that's a lie- I had met him once briefly and previously before then. But, it was THAT show, and THAT night that changed everything - it changed my life forever, no joke!

That my dear friends, was 11 years ago.

DUDE, I know. That's like...forever. It's like the never ending one night stand, no?

We saw many of your shows for several months when we first were together..and then this thing happened that kinda deterred us from dancing and twirling and living life with no responsibility... I kinda, um, got pregnant and 9 months later gave birth to a beautiful little boy. I made him listen "Where the Fields Grow Green" while he was in utero, and I swear he took over the spinning and shaking for me. I married his Daddy that following year.

Even though we weren't at many of your concerts in person - we still 'followed' you. We kept up with you through friends, and the Internet. We always jammed your music at home and danced as a family, even though we were far removed from Hookahville.

The best thing you gave me - was a soundtrack to one of the best times of my life. Whenever I am feeling blue, or frustrated or confined by the life I now lead, I know that I can very easily slip away by listening to YOU. I am so pleased that you all are still making music - I know some things have changed, but you are still very much you.

Maybe, just maybe, one day - 11 years later, The hubby and I will shuck responsiblity for a night and come dance our 30 year old tooshies off, and remember what it felt like to be 17, 18, 19 and 20 again.

Thank you for giving me memories that have lasted a life time.


I was doing SO great with my goal of writing every day for 30 days, for the first time in ages.

THEN.... I had a bad day (ty author of that crappy song, whoever you are, every time I type those words that tune goes thru my head), and ended up exhausted.

THEN...yesterday we had a tornado touch down miles from our home - no joke! Thankfully we - and our community are safe. But...we were without power for several hours.

TODAY... I spent catching up on the disastah that was my home and recovering from this yucky cold I've been dealing with.

NOW...I am helping the kids with homework - and making stirfry for dinner.

TONIGHT... I will be watching this with my family. I love mamapundit - she is one of my favorite bloggers, by a mile.  I am particularly attached to the story of her son and his addiction that eventually lead to his much too early death. He reminds me of so many of the kids Wilo and I knew way back in our "hippie" days. Kids who had such the future ahead of them, but were so entangled in the drug scene despite wanting to be healthy.  I am watching with my own children  - they are never to old to see what can happen, and how choices we make affect those around us. I invite you to watch as well.

AFTER... the kids go to bed...I will catch up on my blogging...hopefully, right?

Monday, October 25, 2010

God, Dad, & Neighbors turned Friends

Today falls into that category of things which should not be blogged.

Though, I will say - I am very, very, very grateful for the love shown to me by God, My Father, and Two Neighbors who I'd be proud to call my friends.

That being said - I am very, very, very tired at the moment. I am usually good to go at this moment and would attack my 30 days with fervor, but alas, I am wicked tired.

My couch keeps giving me these come hither looks and striking sexy, comfortable poses. I am finding it very hard to resist.

I will return tomorrow - God Willing - with a 2 for 1 special!

 Good posts ahead, my dahlings.

Baby Quatro @ 4 months old!

Happy FOURTH Month, Baby John. 

I cannot help but to hold you, hug you, love you 
and KNOW God gave you to us for a reason.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

30 Days of Truth - DAY Twelve

Something you never get compliments on.

If you know me personally - you've probably heard me joke about this before, it's really NO secret...

I am never, ever complimented on my SINGING!

It's kind of funny how the previous question and this question are related - while my speaking voice is drop dead singing voice is just......drop dead.

I'm not exaggerating - think: American Idol REJECT show. Yes, THAT bad.

The thing is - even though I am awfully, horrifically, terrible at it - I. LOVE. TO. SING.  Aaaaand, since I don't try to make a living out of it - or try to be America's Next Supa Star - I think my off key songs should be encouraged! I don't think I should stop just because I am bad at it!  Singing is an excellent way to release some energy or creativity.

It's also a very effective way to wake up sleeping kids or a sleeping hubby....

/evil laugh.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

30 Days of Truth - Day ELEVEN

Something people seem to compliment you the most on.

My superior organizational skills - how, at any given moment, you could ask me for anything and I could tell you exactly where it was at, and point you in the direction of the label.



Whew. I nearly hurt myself laughing at that one.


I have two compliments that I always receive:  (shh, don't hate on my narcissism, I was asked!)

"Wow, Melissa your children are BEAUTIFUL!" (self explanatory, look at my pics!)


"Wow, Melissa you have an incredible voice".

Noooooo, I'm not joking with this one, I promise. We aren't talking about my singing voice! We are talking about my SPEAKING VOICE. 

Let me elaborate - I've heard this since I was in second grade - a teacher told me, after using a microphone for something, that I really needed to look into radio, because my voice was incredible. Not kidding.

Then, I was given a note from a boy in Middle School that said, "I could listen to your voice every day. You should always volunteer to read". 

In High School, I was very active in Theatre (yeah, don't be surprised, I admitted I was geeklicious) and had my fair share of leading roles (in non musicals, of course) where I was complimented on the tone, flow and sound of my voice. I also had a very good Friend around that time who said, "Damn, Melissa, even when you are sick, your voice is SEXY! Can you call me every time you have a cold, I love the raspy!?"

Fast forward to me being a working adult - as a Sales Manager, I did so much work on the phone. My voice is what made people return calls, agree to meet me, and eventually buy what I was selling.

Then, in my delicious hobby of WoW - I am complimented on my voice every. single. time. I hop on vent. Actually, compliment is way too classy of a word. More like Virtually Sexually Harassed. At first, I loved all the attention from the nerdy boys - but now, a few years later, find it wicked annoying. I'm like, Whatevs, lets just kill shit ok!? I joke about wanting to sound fat and ugly so that they will leave me alone - cause the fact that I'm married with a bus load of children doesn't.

My all time favorite response goes like this....

Annoying WoW BoyOhhhh, damnnnn girl, your voice is HAWTTTTT!

Me: Oh really?

Annoying WoW Boy: Hellz Yeah, Girl, I'm talking HAWTTT, there ain't no other hawt as you in this game, yo!

MeYeah, Thanks. I've heard this before - people are all the time telling me I sound like a girl.

 Good times, yo! 

30 Days of Truth - Day TEN!

Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.

In my current life - there is no one that needs to be let go, and no one that I wish I didn't know. I keep my life pretty close knit, and only invite people into it when I want them to be there, and they want to be there as well.

I don't see the point of wasting time on someone who doesn't want my friendship, love or attention.

That being said - in the past, I have held on to someone for too long. There are parts of me that wish I never knew them, because in the end, they hurt me. They hurt my heart, and those wounds take some time to heal.  But, ultimately, they weren't supposed to be part of my life and once I accepted that, it became much easier to let them go.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

The Hemp Hat

I've been going through some of the boxes of misc crap keepsake boxes in my closet looking for The List. I haven't found it yet - but I did come across the hemp hat Wilo used to wear wayyyy back in the day. He was wearing it the day we met, and wore it for a couple years after that. 

I loved it back then - it obviously screams HIPPIE BOY, right? 
Even if it isn't the most...stylish. Tee. Hee. Raegan (of course it was Raegan) thought it screamed HIPPIE LITTLE GIRL and she wanted to Rock it - and some silly faces - too.

He kinda grew out of the hat a little - I mean, it doesn't have its full effect when you are wearing a flannel driving a minivan with your wifey and kiddies in tow, you know?

He'll bust it out from time to time, usually after he's had a few beers and a song or story pops up that makes him remember those days. 

Who knew - wayyyyy back then - that his little girl - his third of four children, would be loving it today, nearly eleven years later.

30 Days of Truth - DAY NINE

Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

I've been going back and forth about who I wanted to write about in this post. I've had my fair share of good friendships fade into the sunset for reasons no other than, sometimes Life just happens. Paths Cross and veer off into their own direction, as they are bound to do. I do love it when the paths cross again in the future - they almost always do, in my circumstance. 

Thanks to the beauty of Social Networking, I've connected with just about everyone I've been friends with in the course of my life. Except for...

Our long lost friends Joe and Jeanette. Joe was Wilo's best friend through school - and Jeanette was a good friend of mine. She and Joe got together around the same time as Wil and I did. They were our good friends through the birth of our first child, and served as the Best Man and Maid of Honor at our wedding. They, too, went on to get married.

I would say that we started drifting apart after Wilo and I had a 're awaking' of sorts - we both became really focused on our marriage, our children and our careers. We kept in touch with them - and saw them from time to time- for a few years after that. Then...We moved from an Apartment on the North side, to a house on the South East side and we also decided to have a Raegan then too.

That's really the last time we've seen or heard from them. We just drifted apart. Both phone numbers changed, and our addresses changed. I have looked for them on Facebook, time after time after time! But, no luck.

I'd love to see them one day - or at least see what they've been up to, you know?

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Sad Irony.

I just finished answering a question about someone who treated me like shit - or made my life hell. 

I can't let the fact that this question fell on the day where the LGBT community joined forces to take a stand against bulling, slide by without any mention here, on my blog.

Regardless of how you personally feel about homosexuality - you cannot condone or ignore the fact that our children are killing themselves because of the unnecessary pain and humiliation brought on by the hands - and words - of other children.

And it's just not children (teenagers, but they are still, innocent, young children in the big picture of life) who are termed gay - there are stories of heterosexual kids who would rather die then be made fun of one more day by bullies.

It's utterly heartbreaking.  

It is YOUR job as a parent, mentor, neighbor, friend to put a stop to this - and to talk to your children about about love, acceptance, and everyone's basic right to be treated fairly, regardless of any personal, political, religious, or sexual belief. It's YOUR job to set the proper example at home, at work and at play.

To my fellow Christians - I point my finger directly at you, and say that we - ESPECIALLY - need to ensure that WE and our children - are showing God's love to ALL, and that bullying of any nature and for any reason is NOT acceptable.

These deaths are more than tragic.

30 Days of Truth - DAY EIGHT!

Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.

What's with the personal questions that bring up bad memories? What did I sign up for?!


Tee. Hee.

I don't think there is really anyone in my life who has "made my life hell" - I  think that in order for someone to do that to you - you have to let them. I mean, I'm not talking about someone who is tragically kidnapped, or violently harmed, unnecessarily bullied or abused - often those things cannot be controlled.  I'm talking about someone who "makes your life hell" by talking smack, or being cliquey, or taking your boyfriend, breaking your heart or whatever. I think in those instances - you give them the power buy letting their childish actions dictate your life.

That being said - to answer the question - I have had people treat me like total crapola.

SHOCKING. I know! what to tell you about....

Do I tell you about the girl who went out of her way to be mean to me through out Elementary, Middle and High School? No, because she really didn't bother me too much - I acutally felt really sorry for her, to be mean to someone without any reason, is very sad. There, obviously, was something else going on there. And, she was only one person, I had plenty of friends who made up for her mean girl agenda.

Or what about the sleaze ball boss I had once, who had a taste for sleeping with his desk clerks. I. COULD. NOT. STAND. HIM. I don't think I've ever called anyone Scum before and truly meant it. He = scum.  He treated me like crap because when I was asked a question by a superior regarding his activities, I told them what I knew.  Sorry, but if you are gonna do that, then well, keep that behind closed doors. But, I eventutally had the last laugh - as when he was obviously, and knowingly breaking some OSHA laws and refused to correct them after multiple people brought them to his attention...I, um..turned him in. Turns out, those OSHA guys respond wicked quickly to complaints filed by a very, very pregnant woman who was forced to inhale massive amounts of carpenter dust all day. Go Figure!

Or Do I tell you about how a group of women at competitor hotels went out of their way to exclude me from their clique? Yeah, that was sooo awful - I  had no choice but to deal with them and put on a smile because that's what Sales does. They had no reason to be so mean - other than the fact that they were old and bitter. I'm not joking. I was a 23 year old, pretty, ambitious girl who was stealing their bookings - and they hated me! And made no secret of it - sure they were nice when they had to be, but as soon as no one was watching - they were down right, MEAN.  Those years - dealing with those women - were wayyyyyyyyy worse than any part of my High School career.

I could probably go on and on and on about people who've treated me poorly, but I remain thankful and grateful that I could write page after page about people who have shown me love, friendship, and kindness.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

30 Days of Truth - DAY SEVEN

Someone who has made your life worth living for:

I have four someones.

Seriously  - I joke about being absolutely-effing-crazy for having so many children, but they really do give me purpose in this crazy life.  The moment I became a parent the world stopped revolving around me, and instead focused on the needs, securities, and happiness of my children. I never realized how much I would immediately and forever and immensely I would love them, and how unselfishly committed to their well being I would be, despite the sacrifices that would be made. Great responsibility comes with being a parent, but so do greater rewards.

Like when  Jake comes in from playing with his friends and gives me a huge bear hug out of the blue...Or when Abby and  I share a secret look and can tell we are thinking the exact same thing... Or when Raegan tells me: You are sooooo beauuuuutiful, Mommy....or When Baby John erupts into smiles as I pick him up from sleeping...

Life with Children are full of moments that make life worth living.

Chunky, Teething Monkey

Raegan and I are a bit under the weather - we're recuperating from a rather short but exhausting, hideous cold. Here is hoping we are feeling better tomorrow, because neither of us are the nicest when we are feeling bad. I am hoping that it will not spread to the other kiddies - especially Baby John as he is a baby and already a little uncomfortable due to his....teeth!

Yep, I said it.


I am convinced he is teething - he will be 4 months old next week - it's totally possible. His big brother had a tooth at 4 months (teething starting at 2 months, no joke!), Raegan at 5 months, and Abby at 6months. It usually takes a month or two before it breaks through. Judging by how much he is drooling, how constantly he is biting his fingers, and how he'll gum the heck out of your knuckle - I am positive his pearly whites are on their way.

With us being sick - I've tried not to hold John anymore than I've had to today. Which, let me tell you, is HARD. I love that little boy so much - and he loves me back tenfold. It's been hard not to give him smooches and hear him giggle!

He spent most of his play time today on the floor, practicing his tummy time and trying desperately to roll over. He's getting close - he's about three quarters of the way over. He's plowing through his physical milestones like a pro - he reminds me a lot of Jake in that regard. He has some really strong head control - and he has found his hands. He can already grasp on to this adorable little monkey toy my parents gave him - a monkey for a chunky monkey! 

Monday, October 18, 2010

30 Days of Truth - DAY SIX

Something you hope never to do:

I hope I never have to grieve the loss of any of my children.

I think it's the most horrific sense of loss imaginable - and one that leaves a void that is never, ever filled.

Two of my daily bloggers have had to mourn the death of their children - and have  been brave enough to share the grieving process with their readers: and I have so much respect for both of these women, and am so very, very sorry for their insurmountable loss.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

My Sweet - Too Much Like Her Mother - Abby.

Over all - she's a pretty incredible little girl. 
Though - She's not so little anymore...
I must remember shes is almost 9, and nearly a pre-teen.

30 Days of Truth - Earlllly on day 5

Something you hope to do in your life.

One of the coolest things Wilo and I have ever done together was way back in the day - wayyyy back, like before we were married and we only had Jakob (aka LIVING IN SIN. Tee. Hee) - was spend a wonderful, memorable, baby free night drinking too much cheap wine (and probably partaking in other things - hellloooo, it was our hippie days!) and making a list of all the things we wanted to do together in the future.

The list is about 50 things long - and written on this awesome 13x9, pretty stationary. Some things are very realistic and direct - others are very abstract. I've always kept list, and as we've had our lives together, we've been able to check off some things as we've completed them.


Sigh, at myself. 

It is around here somewhere - tucked away in a keepsake box, I'm sure. The trouble is - my closet is full of keepsake boxes, and going through all of them would require A LOT of effort, and um hellooooo, I have four children - and 3 extra tonight and there is no blasted way I'm gonna even attempt to do that. Are you crazy?

I'm gonna address some of the ones I know by heart - I've read that list hundreds of times, and it's brought me great comfort when I need to remember how blissfully in love Wilo and I were back then - and how full of passion and ambition we were. (Not that we are not now, it's just 11 years later, you know!)

Anyways - we've been able to cross a couple of things off the list...

Like me visiting California and me touching an actual REAL mountain (and wilo was very specific - he's from New Mexico, and noted that "mountain" did not include any hill in West Virgina).

We've lived in a House - we've owned a few cars - we've accomplished getting Married - and having FOUR children (yes, yes I did write I wanted to have FOUR kids! I even specified having two girls and two boys - go figure! Bat Shit Crazy, I was).

We've read to our children every day (almost every day, there is this thing called SUMMER, don't hate! We totally slack during the summer with late nights and all) - and we've taught them about God.

We've influenced their tastes in music to the best of our Rock and Roll abilities (damn you Jonas Brothers and Miley Cyrus), and we've told each other that we love each other a greater portion of the days we've spent together.

Here are some things from that list that we have YET to do - and we HOPE to do someday, in the future.

-  Ride Horses in Montana

 - Visit Kenya and go on a Safari

 - Go back to College

 - Backpack through Europe with $5000 and NO itinerary -  see as much as we can, for as long as we can

 - Visit the Balloon Fiesta in New Mexico

 - Learn to speak two languages

- See the Great Wall of China

 - Buy a really expensive telescope

 - Stand under the Great Redwoods 

 - Climb Mount Everest

 - Take a train in Grand Central Station

- Hike the Appalachian Trail

 Isn't that great? 50 things of that nature....Makes me wanna go find that list.

Next Door Nature

Jake and his Daddy like to go for long bike rides together. It's delightful to find this little pocket of beauty less than two minutes from where we live.  To me...these pictures are better than gold.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

30 Days of Truth - DAY FOUR

Something you have to forgive someone for.

Let me preface this by saying that it's pretty easy for me to forgive you - if you've wronged me in anyway. I am totally a forgive and forget kind of girl.  I don't hold grudges typically, I hate the negative feelings they produce. It just feels better to be loving and forgiving, right? It SO does.

And, that awesome forgiveness I've received from Jesus - the one I talked about yesterday - well, He tells us to forgive others as He has forgave us. And in my case, he's forgiven me at least a million times, so I have to extend the same mercy and compassion, a million times over.

That being said.

I AM human (shocking, I know! ), and this question does come at a time where I do feel like I do have something outstanding and someone I have to forgive for something. ( And trust me, if you are reading this blog, then it is certainly not you.)

I had (notice the tense) a friend - and I thought really highly of this person. Like reallllllly highly of them - they kinda set the bar as far as special goes. I cared for them very much - I loved them! Then, some things happen - BIG things - LIFE things - and their true character came out. Where I thought this person would handle these things with care, concern, caution and compassion -  They instead did the opposite: no care, no concern, no caution, and no compassion. They've acted very cowardly and very selfishly, in my opinion.

What bothers me most is - I've tried to reach out to this person - to no avail. I can respect not wanting to talk about it - or not wanting to deal with it. I can respect a friendship ending; it happens. I'm a big girl, I can handle it. But, what I cannot respect - is just refusing to talk to me one way or another. Even if it was a "I don't want to hear from you ever again" conversation - it would be SOMETHING.

Being ignored - and treated like you don't even exist - is one of the worst feelings I've ever felt. And I can't believe that this person was the first person to make me feel this way.

So, I need to forgive them - without them asking for it, without them realizing how they've hurt me, and without all the answers I'd like. I know I should just come to peace with everything, and extend forgiveness without question, without a conversation, without discussion, without hesitating....

But for right now........I am finding it impossible to do so.

Friday, October 15, 2010

30 Days of Truth - DAY THREE.

Something you have to forgive yourself for:

The first two questions were very easy for me to answer. These past two years of being at home - have left much time for self reflection and review. I probably could have written essays regarding things I love about myself and things I hate. You get to know yourself pretty well when it's just you and a toddler for the most of the day! Um, you are the only one to really talk to sometimes.... ; )

But, then this question pops up. And BAM! Here you go: Personal Question. On the Internet. For Everyone to see. Not just ANY personal question - a personal question about Forgiveness. Forgiving Yourself, no less. I find it easy to forgive others - but forgiving myself??

So, for the first time - I struggled!

I started to think of all the times I've failed myself - and things that required self forgiveness.  Things that made me cringe remembering them, things that made me feel stupid, or novice - things I was ashamed of, things that I needed to forgive myself for...

I tried writing about something very personal - and then was like um.... Noooo....this IS the Internet. I mean hellllooo, there are things you keep private, you know?

THEN I started to write about something semi-personal and funny - but it involves other people, and my professional life,  making it soooo incredibly off limits.

I was like Geeeeze, This is really hard for me to answer!  That's reallllllly frustrating for me because I don't have a problem being open! Not here, not on my blog, and not in real life. One of the greatest compliments I ever received was someone who said: "Just ask her, you can ask Melissa ANYTHING and She'll tell you the truth!" - it's sooo true, that's how I am. So why the struggle with this silly question?

 But then....I figured out why it was so hard to land on something...

Forgiving yourself can be hard to do. It's very hard for me to do. I've let myself down greatly before - you have no idea. I also let myself down daily - we all do.  You know what I get snippy when you shouldn't have, or you curse when really it wasn't appropriate, or when you let your mind wander or you yell at someone driving... There are no perfect people.  Some days, I find myself asking for forgiveness ALL. DAY. LONG. 

The great thing is -  I know Jesus, and He IS perfect. He's already forgiven me of these things - and I don't have to remember them one by one.  I don't have to dwell on these things however big or small. I have His forgiveness forever. He casts my sins, my failures, my disappointments all away, never to be remembered again. I don't have to think about them, they are long forgotten. It's the gift he gives me for believing - believing that Jesus is who he says he is and that He died for me.

Listen to this song - it's been a favorite of mine for many years, and sums up what I'm trying to say perfectly.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

30 Days of Truth: Day Two

Something you love about yourself:

I love how you can tell me anything and I will not judge you, no matter the nature of the subject. Nothing really phases me - or "scares" me away, or makes me think different of you. I base all my opinions on how you treat me, my kids and my family.

I love how I am loyal like a lion - once a true friendship has been made, it is forever with me. Time, Distance, Circumstance - they all are trivial and do not deter the relationship. I am the friend that you can go weeks with out talking with, call me out of the blue, and we pick up right where we left off. 

I love how material things, or social status mean nothing to me. None of that crap determines what kind of person you are, and you certainly cannot take that stuff with you. No one will remember that you made millions of dollars, or that you drove a fancy car - but they will remember how you treated them.

I love the fact that I am generous with out hesitation. If I have it, then so can you.

I love how I am forever the cheerleader - and I can almost always find a bright side to things.

I love how I can be so 'connected' and enamored with the Internet and technology,  yet find total comfort and solace in the middle of the woods, so far from those things.

I love how I cannot sing, but that does not stop me from doing so in the privacy of my own home.

Andddd...I love how I find myself soooo lovable.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

30 Days of Truth - DAY ONE

Something you hate about yourself:

I hate the fact that I am quite possibly the messiest person in my house, if the truth be told.

I hate how I can replay uncomfortable situations over and over in my head, wishing I would've done or said something differently.

And, I hate that I am terribly, terribly, terribly grumpy and mean when I first wake up, every day. I'm not joking when I say I need my coffee and the chance to 'wake up' before I talk to anyone. 

30 Days of Truth

As I previously mentioned, there is intitative amongst several bloggers, called "30 Days of Truth".  Many writers are doing it as away to find writing muse, posting motivation, and to foster the habit of writing every day. I'm gonna join in the fun. So, Come in..sit down..and get to know me better.

Here are the 30 Questions if you would like to join in the fun:

Day 01  Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02  Something you love about yourself.
Day 03  Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04  Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05  Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06  Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07  Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08  Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09  Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10  Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11  Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12  Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13  A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14  A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15  Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16  Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17  A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18  Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19  What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20  Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21  Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22  Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23  Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24  Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs.
Day 25  The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26  Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27  What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28  What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29  Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30  A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

Follow Up: A Tiny Ton of Things

Sisters: Thank you very much to the friends who took the time to tell me about you and your sister(s)! I enjoyed hearing about each one. It seems that sisters are much like any other relationship - all of them are very different, and very unique. Each one has their own positives and negatives, and no two are alike. I was comforted knowing that many sisters did not get along at all growing up, but as adults now share common bonds. I was also tickled to hear of a friend who has 5 sisters (yes 6 girls in a home growing up!) - and the perspective she shared. I did not know that about her - so for me, her response in particular, was delightful, witty and very funny. But, she basically echoed the same deal - each sister, each family, each relationship were very unique and tailored to that specific sister.

Working Out:  Um......Yeahhhhh......about that..... Can't I just go hiking?! It TOTALLY counts. On a somewhat related note - I realized that these awesome pair of jeans I was trying desperately to squeeze myself into were actually size 10's and not size 14's - so I did feel better about not being able to pull them past my hips. Oh, and I bought Diet Pop. (Way to go, me! )

Dream Job:  In the middle of my emails about Sisters, I came across a note that I had, sadly, overlooked. It was a note from an 'internet' friend - a lovely lady who I 'met' online shortly after Raegan was born. We share a mutual 'real life' friend - but have never met. She and I have shared many a conversation about kids, family, God, cooking, etc. I find her to be very down to earth, very kind, and very genuine. She has three gorgeous sons, who are teenagers. Her perspective is always right on - and the note she sent me, was heaven sent. She expressed how she had been on both sides of the mom deal - a stay at home mom, and a working mom, and then a working mom who went through College later in life.  She wanted me to know - that she felt where I was coming from - and that ultimatley, God would put me right where I needed to be at that specific moment. She was and is SO RIGHT. Thank you so much, for sharing those words with me friend, they were so comforting and encouraging.

Dream Job Related: So, in regards to the Dream Job. Maybe it wasn't actually my dream job after all. I mean, it was soooooooo ME. But, maybe my real dream job is a passion that is unrelated to hospitality, social media and technology. I think my real dream job would be to be paid for writing. Or maybe to fulfill my childhood dream of becoming a teacher. Maybe God has something I don't even recognize as a possibility down the road for me. Who knows, right? We are never too old to keep dreaming.

Total House Re-Organization: ahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Yeahhhhh, right. Very hard to do with a 3 year old, and a 3.5 month old at home, and a husband who works evenings leaving me with FOUR kids to care for......Somewhere, right now, a woman who is in the same spot as I am, but who has everything labeled, neat and organized is saying, "Pffffffft....tough up, Meli!" and I say to her....You are a better woman than I am, for sure.

Blogging: I'm starting this '30 days of Truth" deal. Many bloggers across the web are doing it...It's pretty simple - there are 30 questions that you answer honestly, day by day. The thought is to inspire us all to write daily. You can start whenever you want - just have to finish it. I suck at consistency when it comes to this blog - sooo let's see how we do with it, no?

There you go, think I covered everything left outstanding.....

Email Crisis

Friday, October 8, 2010

Best. Date. Ever.

Is there really any better way to spend a Friday night than with a cup of one of my favorite kinds of coffee, the Internet,  my camera and my gorgeous Baby Quatro? I think not! He's one of the best dates I've ever had, and for the next several years, I will be his lady love.

If I Only Had The Nerve - Repost

I've mentioned before that I have a few devotions that I've read for years, and that I read every day. Although they are electronic devotions - and do not take the place of reading my bible - God has used them to speak to me on a variety of topics, and I am always amazed and amused when he speaks directly to me through them.

I feel led to post the one from today - as I think it's applicable to many situations for many people. Without going into detail - this devotion applies to me today, in regards to one particular, "scary" situation. While I have given this to God several months ago, it still creeps up from time to time and leaves me feeling uneasy and unsure. I have been praying about it specifically this week - and appreciated God's Message to me today.

I can't shake the feeling to repost it - sooo here you go - maybe you will find comfort or direction in it's words as well.

The devotion comes from Proverbs 31 Ministries - from their Encouragement for Today Series. You can find the direct link to the devotion, here. You should check them out in general - I love their posts!

If I Only Had the Nerve
Micca Monda Campbell

"So be strong and courageous, all you who put your hope in the Lord!" Psalm 31:24 (NLT)

There are two choices. We will either cower away from hard situations or charge toward them with courage. As for the cowardly lion in the classical movie The Wizard of OZ, he did both. Of all the Oz characters, I best identify with him.

Like the lion, I believe I could do anything
if I only had the nerve. The trouble is that in scary situations the only "nerve" I have is a nervous stomach.

I've faced some pretty hard circumstances in my life, and I've discovered that I'm more courageous than I ever dreamed. One of the hurdles that took real courage was the time I was asked to speak before a group of teens.

I was asked to give a devotional message to the band members of a Christian school as they prepared to compete with other high school bands, at the state competition. On my way to the school that fall morning, my heart was full of joy. I was eager and well prepared to speak to the teens. All was going well until I pulled into the school's parking lot.

Suddenly, I was paralyzed by fear. With my hands frozen to the steering wheel of the car, I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't believe I had said, "Yes" to speak to anyone! Doubts about my ability and message flooded my heart and mind. I was in full-blown panic mode. With my hands still glued to the wheel, I turned and looked at the passenger seat. In my mind's eye, Satan was sitting there with a boastful grin painted across his devilish face that taunted me with doubt.
How am I going to pull this off? I anxiously wondered.

I had a choice to make. Either I could allow my anxiety to prevent me from speaking or I could face the platform with courage. How does one find courage when they're trembling in fear? Sometimes it comes down to deciding what is more important—the thing we need to do or yielding to our fear. Courage is not absence of fear as you might think. Rather, it withstands fear. Being courageous is being brave enough to move through our fears. How? We put our hope in God who will see us through.

That day in my car when fear gripped me, I searched my thoughts only to discover that my nervousness is based on pride.
What will they think of me? I nervously wondered. Knowing my own limitations created doubt in my mind, which in turn could have caused me to back away. Instead, I decided to move forward in faith. My heart warmed as I considered what was more important. God wanted to use me to speak truth and encouragement to those teens. Sure, my heart was pounding and my knees were knocking, but I chose to be brave. I chose to speak--afraid. The result was amazing. That's the incredible truth about courage. It transforms the ordinary into something extraordinary.

When you feel fearful, what's at the source? Are you focusing on yourself? Taking our eyes off ourselves helps us to see past our fears to the needs of others.

Where has God placed you right now? Are you in an ungodly workplace? Perhaps, you're in a bad relationship with a spouse or friend. Maybe you're living beside unbelieving neighbors or you have to care for aging parents. Whatever your situation, you have a decision to make. Will you cower away or charge forth in faith? While you may face scary risks, think of the difference you could make in someone's life or a whole community if you simply choose to be courageous!

Whatever God is calling you to do, this is His promise. "Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go" (Joshua 1:9). Through you and me God can make a difference, perhaps save a life. The possibilities are endless
if you only have the nerve.
Dear Lord, break this stronghold of fear and worry in my life. Increase my faith in You. Be my stronghold and my provision and in You will I trust. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

So many LOL's...

Permanent link to this comic:

Image URL (for hotlinking/embedding):

Tuesday, October 5, 2010


I was watching my daughters this past weekend - and it made me think about them being sisters. There is a very interesting dynamic between them. I think there is something interesting, unique and special between most sisters.

I have a sister. She's beautiful, talented, ambitious, warm, and caring. She's currently in College - studying to be a teacher. I am so incredibly proud of her. I can't even find the words to describe it - I'm just realllllllllllllly proud of her. I think I'm honored to be her big sister.

It is a lot easier for us to relate at this point in our lives - there is a 9 year age difference between she and I. She's an adult now - and I find her youth to be refreshing. (That's just about the oldest sounding sentence I think I've ever written. I am one word away from saying hooligans there, no?) Anyways - when we were growing up, I felt the age difference. I was the oldest, she was the youngest - with two brothers in between. There is not much a 12 year old and a 3 year old have in common, you know? I was more her big sister in the responsible, loving, caregiver kinda way. Like I said, the age difference becomes smaller and smaller as you become older, least in our case. I think we are closer now than we have ever been, and I think that will continue to happen.

My girls are 5 1/2 years a part. Right now, they feel the age gap a little.  While they enjoy playing the same things - babies, house, barbies, school, office, fashion - they both play them differently than each other. Abby likes to have her more grown up versions of "the game" and Raegan still likes to pretend she's a princess in every scenario. This irritates Abby sometimes - she'll say something like: "Ummmm...NO Raegan, You CAN'T be the princess, you are just a regular girl in my classroom!!". Raegan, of course, can't stand hearing this and overreacts, and I end up with a teary eyed Raegan..sniff sniffing, frowning and telling me how you can be a princess anywhere and Abby was a mean, mean teacher.

I wonder where they will be as that 5 years becomes smaller and smaller. I mean - flash foward - Raegan is 16 and Abby is 21! Ohhhhh My. Wilo better get ready for that! I better get ready for that!

As I was pondering the relationships between my two girls - I became curious of all of you. Many of you have a sister too. Some of you have two, or even three! Some of you are very close in age, some of you are very far a part. Some of you are the Older Sister, Some of you are the Younger sister. Some of you are close, some are friends and some are enemies.

If you have a minute, I invite you to tell me your thoughts on your relationship with your sister and how it's matured from childhood to adult hood, and the dynamic between you both. You can say as much or as little as you would like. This is just for my own personal knowledge, I'm not gonna bust out your business on the world wide web, I'm just curious and excited to get to know you better. You can leave me a comment on this Facebook post, or you can send me an email, or you can even call a sista if you have my digits, yo!

Thank you for playing : )

Forever in Blue Jeans

One of my favorite Neil Diamond songs...evah.  I like him, so what?! Don't hate! Everyone should like Neil Diamond.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Ahh, Age Three

Yes...yes, those are Q-Tips stuck in a donut to resemble hands and fingers. Duh.

(P.S. I do not approve of playing with food when you should be eating it and watching your morning shows, but this made me laugh out loud while I was having my first cup of coffee. I mean, Seriously? Why would you do that?! Lord.)

Typical Meli!

Of course I would slack on blogging after writing about how awesomely consistent I've been, right? Typical!

Even though, the normal slacking wasn't what was in the way this time - My Internet, TV, and Phone were all out for a day or so. That was lame - and a testament as to my hesitation with having all three tied together in one tower - we have AT&T U-verse. We switched a few months back and this was my number one issue. But, to AT&T's credit, all things considered they handled it very promptly and efficiently. My only complaint was that the Cable Guy was a cutie, and I was and had been mothering four children all day. Tee. Hee.

I also was hit with the Organize Everything bug. Things can get quickly out of control in my house, and it was long over due for attention. I dumped every single toy box, shoe bin and bookshelf out in my living room on a whim and sorted and tossed - it was SO great. It took much longer than expected - I started at 2, and finished at Eleven. Mind you - from the hours of 3 to 9, I was not working - I kinda forgot about the having all the kids home part..... ; ) But, with organizing - one thing leads to another and now I feel like everything needs redone. It's really hard because its on top of every day cleaning on top of everyday parenting and it's just taking forrreeevvvverrr and I feel like I'll never  be done. /Woe is me!

I also spent an evening with my best friend and her fellow. I think this falls into the category of which I should not blog - but all I can say is...WOW!! And, OMG!! And, Go Team Prince Charming.

I have NOT been playing Warcraft - and am in fact, still completely bored with it. I reactivated my account, logged on, then logged off. No deal. I am actually pissy I spent money on it. Here is hoping the next expansion will capture my interest or that I find a different hobby.

So, yeah. Lots of stuff occupying my time, this past week!