Thursday, June 3, 2010

Worry Less, Emo lady!

Wow, I was a little emo in that last post, no? Sooo emotional that it took me nearly a month to write again! Geesh.

As a follow up - If you are a parent, mom or dad, and have never been overwhelmed or frustrated with your children...YOU ARE NOT DOING IT RIGHT. It's only normal to have those episodes. Enough said.

This past month has been stressful a bit as we prepare for summer vacation (wooohooo) and for the arrival of our fourth child. Although this is our fourth tour on this kid bearing circuit - there is unchartered territory to be explored. Namely the frontier entitled - "Melissa doesn't have a fancy job this time!"

Now, we are not and have not ever been "wealthy". But, we have always been able to manage comfortably with two incomes. Even when Jake and Abby were little - we had two paychecks that made life easier. When Raegan was born - I worked from home during my maternity leave, and then went right into another full time fancy job. We felt some strain, but not so much.

That being said - the fact we would be bringing another living, breathing, eating individual into the house - on one income - hit me this month. And, not gonna lie, it stressed me out. No joke - I was walking thru Kroger and went down the baby isle just to "see" and well....I nearly had a panic attack when I remembered how much formula and diapers added to a grocery bill.

I am so not that girl, either. I am the "Don't worry, God will provide, we will make it" girl. So, for me to have a moment of panic - that was big news! Thankfully, as in any good relationship, sensing my moments of weakness, Wilo stepped up and calmed me down... I heard him echo words I've spoken over the past two years of this stay at home mom gig - "Don't worry, Melissa - Just trust God".

And that I did. And you know what? The more I trusted God, the more things began to come together. Everywhere I looked - in my bible, in my email, on Facebook, on Twitter - the message was clear: "Worry Less, Pray More".

Now, of course, all of this praying and trusting didn't equal someone paying my bills for six months, or a year's supply of diapers, or a million dollars in my bank account. Jesus doesn't promise to take all of our struggles and problems away - but He does promise to see us through them. He gave me a sense of peace, and a reminder that we were not alone... He put some things in place that eliminated some of the stress and left us feeling encouraged. I am grateful!

I am also grateful that school is out for summer!!! Shhhh. Don't tell the kiddies - but I was and am as excited as they were. I became tired of blasted homework too! And the 7am mornings...please, not sad to see them go. I mean, I more than likely, will be seeing the break of dawn with the new baby but at least I will not be pressured to get two kids dressed, fed and off to the bus. I mean, if they wanna stay in their jammies - or sleep late - they can! Yippie!

Congrats to both of them for a successful year - I now officially have a 4th grader, and a 3rd grader. Wowza. Time sure does fly. I think that makes me old.

Oh my. I should stop before I get all emo about the old thing ; )