Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Meli and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good Evening

Ever have one of those days where you just wanna throw your hands up in the air and say, "Ok, that's it. I'm done. I mean done Done. I mean eff this shiz Done".

That's the night I'm having.

All was well for about 20minutes this evening as we were outside playing - our scheduled time between homework and dinner. The kids were playing nicely.

Then, Jakob, started it off. He was riding his bike in the street - he is only allowed to ride on the sidewalks. He is careless and cars are fast. It's not safe. I don't care if he is nearly 10, that's the rule. I told him to stay out of the street once, and that if he did it again he was off the bike. A kid came around selling books and distracted me and sure enough Jake went back into the street. After I finished with the sales kid, I yelled again - and Jake said, "Sorry, Mom, I forgot". "Ok, Jake one more time, and you off the bike and in the house - got it?" (Please save the judgemental sighs - I know I said one more time already and prolly shoulda stuck with that.). Sure enough - 5 minutes later he's back in the street. "That's it Jake:, I yelled. Did he listen? No he chose to peddle as fast as his feet could go clear down the street, around the sidewalk, back to the street. My neighbors were also out at this point - seeing me being blatantly disrespected and obviously ignored. This went on for about 5 minutes. You know whats worse than your kid not listening and being rude - oh yeah, them doing it in front of other people. He finally went in the house - and I was pissed, not gonna lie. I was embarrassed and frustrated, and I still needed to watch Raegan who was in the front with Abby.

I grounded Jakob from outside and the computer until Friday. I took a breath and went back outside.

I let the girls play for a while and brought them in to finish dinner. We were having ribs, french fries, fruit and green beans.

I notice that Jakob was watching an episode of the Simpson on Hulu. Now, I know that The Simpsons are a cultural icon - but um, they are mostly inappropriate for my kids - the first thing I hear is someting abotu having sex with animals. (I'm totally not judging if you let your kids watch it, a lot of people do, but not me). This, of course, led to another outburst of: "UGH, I hate you mom, all the other kids do it" crap. So I deal, change it to something better.

Then, as I am getting dinner going , I hear Abby freaking out and having a meltdown. I come back to the living room to see what is up - and She's pissed that Jakob took 2 pages out of a journal she was given. My grandmother had made cute little bags for my kids over the past weekend - they had journals, stickers and pencils. Abby had taken all of Jake's 150 stickers and put them in HER book. He had just noticed. He wanted his stickers back - so he ripped them out of her book - her stickers were on the other side. She freaked the heck out - completely unnecessarily. I'm talking 2 year old can't have a piece of candy in the store kinda fit - and she's 8 for goodness sake. Since she was acting like a 2 year old, I told her she was going to be punished like one and that she had to sit on the naughty step. She became so vile and evil and threw such a damn tantrum.

Meanwhile, the timer is going off on the ribs, the green beans were done, and I just needed to throw the fries in my deep fryer. The fryer had been on for a good 45minutes so it was HOT. I dumped the bag of frozen fries not thinking about any ice that could be in the bottom of the bag. And yeah, of course, there was ice. This caused my fryer to overflow. Hot, burning Oil all over my counters, under my microwave, into my sink, and down into my dishwasher. Oh yeah, and over my cute summer dress that woulda been perfect post baby. I scream cause it cared the shit out of me, this causes all kids to gather in the kitchen and watch their mama, melt (not really, the oil wasn't that hot) down herself. I wanted to walk out right then. Fend for yourselves, kiddies.

All this went down in an hour, and of course while Wil is at work. We don't ever have nights like this when he is here. I am so thankful for his job - but I hate only having him home in the evenings once or twice. I love him, and I miss him, and things are just better when he is here.

So here I sit, ranting in a blog, fighting back tears - oil prolly still all over the place. My dinner getting cold - because I lost my apatite. Raegan didn't like any of her dinner - my first picky eater - and is eating cinnamon toast crunch out of the box. Jake is getting ready for a bath and Abby is scowling somewhere I am sure. I am doubting myself as a mother, a friend and a wife. Just feeling like I'm pretty bad at all of those, and here we go, in 6 weeks, another one joins the circus.

I am scared.

I want a cigarette, a glass of wine, and at least 3 days away from my kids.

I cannot have any of those anytime soon.

Woe is me, I know.